Its all rotten....

I was never a higher being.

Nor am I now. But I have certainly come a longway; from the kid who hungrily looked at bakery sweets and silently romanced toys at shops, from being stupidly jealous of my friend's pencil box and angry at myself for being born middle class. I was never confident about my identity.

Where did I belong?
That was the single most piercing question that haunted me always...and still do sometimes..My family was not rich, yet it was not poor...My parents always had 'just enough money' .We were taught to respect and accept it..

We were neither of the 'so called' high castes nor off the trampled down.And I never had to wait for a social revolution.Everybody said that it had already taken place...even before my father was born.

Not that I had a Complex, but this business of accepting scarcity with dignity was too much for me..
Classic Indian middle class dilemma...
I also got my share of the collective fatigue that my community suffered from while trying to find its position in the post revolutionary social hierarchy. I just couldn't place myself.

It carved niches of insecurity in my personality..

I wanted to be poor...so that I could happily be poor.
Or nauseatingly rich. So that I could flaunt it and live life king size....

Stupid me...
I tried to convince myself for a long time that Indians should not thinklike that..
That when millions starve, you can't be ambitious..
That sacrifice is better than success..
That you shouldn't dream big...


Stupidity...
Nothing changed in this country and nothing will...
Because we got one billion hypocrites in this nation..
People who ask you to be patriotic in a caste ridden, class ridden culture..
People who rape women and celebrate durga puja..
People who put surname above qualifications....
This country is poor because it should be...
This country stinks....

invest....?

Its been almost two years since I started working fulltime
Believe it or not, my first job was Teaching…I was an English teacher..
I taught English to MBA aspirants…and since it was a contract job, I got paid by the hour and did not worry at all about paying taxes…I didn’t make that much..

But now I am a Techie and will have to keep aside some Moolah to feed the government unless…

INVEST….

Speaking about investment…An Insurance Agent came and met me the other day…He wanted to make my future secure,,,gift my kids( I don’t have them yet…im not even married…..!) a wonderful future..He asked me whether I had already fallen prey to another investment banker or Insurance militant….hell no..
…I thought for a while ,,mentally assessing my position
my till date investment included….

5 Black jockeys..
5 White Banyans (Tantex to be precise…Mr Thomson)
2 Jeans..
A couple of shirts and Tees..
Food…
Intoxication….
Movies…
Books…

No…
No Loans
No shares
No savings certificate
No Insurance policies
No Mutual Funds..

Yes..
Credit Card..( 3to be precise)
Pending Credit Statement… on two of them
A kaali Salary account..

‘Kannan…
I got this excellent plan for you, very small premium…very high returns…’
Just 18670 per year and you’ll get post retirement income of 25 Lakhs…2.5 Million Rupeess…
This is just the right time to invest..”

Everything was excellent…
The plan..
The agent..
The time…
Except my bank balance…

But I felt secure…
Boastmaster Miser owed me 40 Rupees..
ML owed me 50 Rupees…
I would get 90 rupees any minute….

I can demand it, ask politely or even beg for it…
And if they did not give it to me still….I can always kidnap one of them and ask the other for a Ransom
Or maybe I can kill them both and get everything…..
life holds immense possibilities….
And I can always ask Shi.. for anything…

‘This policy is excellent…..”

Deaf ears…I walked through him…arrogance personified..

Left Out...?

Nowadays I have the feeling that im really out of touch with what’s happening in the technical world…
I shudder on hearing words like ipod or GPRS enabled…

For someone who used to keep track of all silly developments and review all new products its really a letdown when you get naturally eliminated in a related discussions

Uninitiated…?
No just lost track…But I think there are many or rather a majority like me…
However I managed to find out that GPRS helps you browse anywhere with a mobile and an Ipod does many things everywhere…and feltl exhausted after being through the thingamajigs associated with each…half of which I never understood and doubt whether I will ever………

I feel ashamed when the kid next door, the hero of our area, Debashish cries out at every new AD that pops in the idiot box, he seems to know everything…Once in another sphere of time, I was Debashish, who updated the entire family on everything…

I guess this happens with all, save a few who are always alert and vigilant…or some who are always curious and ambitious…others just drift along to be carried into the future by the younger generations…

Loafers of the World....

Lately I have been a little too lazy.
Lazy even to put on a shirt …lazy even to brush ,shave or bath…maybe it’s the Pune Climate..
Cold. Seems its got some weird proportional relation to my levels of activity… or rather inactivity.
Its specifically my level since it doesn’t seem to affect anyone around me…

They are all working hard and straight…
Boastmaster miser watches all the matches, sleeps late and deep, wakes up early and goes to office…
Mr. Hypocrisy is never tired; he would rather go on and on than take rest…
Same with lazy devil. Though he is called so…

Even ML who was lazy enuf to play fudball seems to have turned into a hard worker….

Its all ‘SEEMS”
Maybe it seems so only..
They are only appearing as hard workers because am doing nothing…
Its relative…
I guess Einstein was right after all…and he did a. great favor to Israel by refusing their Presidency..
Else the nation would have breeded a host of lazy morons like me…

I got work at office…documents to study and also prepare for an exam…
A trap which I laid for myself…hurting my conscience, ego…mind, heart..everything..

Why is this so?

Isn’t cruel that a student needs to study to get work….
That a man need to work to get paid…to get a life….???
When will this world progress into an ideal socialistic welfare state democracy where everything will be sponsored?
I leave it to others to think about who ill sponsor…
Great minds afterall give the clue…its for the masses to interpret…..

And you all….who are out reading this….better do it…..
The future is in your hands….
Ill be watching and appreciating you…
Thinking about your sacrifices and efforts…..While I wait here in deep reflection about total revolution………

Bambai Meri Jaan

Bambai account.....

It all started Saturday morning when we boarded our bus to bambai from parihar chowk..Zooming through the express highway basking in the pristine glory of the morning sun amidst the lush greenery ofMaharashthra ...Santhanu had an insight.....Bot great men don't speak out insights...they act out thoughts...

So poor myself along with my dear friend got down at Dadar and askd the way to station..3 kind people showed us 3 different ways to dadar station...vijay and geo had promised to wait for us there...ofcourse they were waiting....but in andheri....on bed...in their dreams...But a few phone calls and some adoring words made our friends jump up from bed and board train...


soon we all were in Church Gate....meeting mumbai in all its glory..we roamed around...snapped a zillion pictures..India Gate,Taj.Madam Cama road...Colaba...the evergreen stars of Bollywood....It was great...seeing the sea after 6 months ,sitting on the marine drive chatting ....


It was around 3 or 4 when we reached Bandra Bandstand...dotted with 100's of couples smooching,hugging..doingeverything short of the final Act..It was funny to see so many umbrellas being put up for more innovative uses...A birds Eye view to the beach from the sea would have spotted a new life form..umbrellas with four legs...sheilding the world from private bliss..The couples were so immersed that inspite of knocks on the umbrella from a certain enterprising gentleman they did not botherto look up or shout....

We walked through the bandstand alongside Salman khan's Flat before we finally settled on a few benches beside "Mannat"- shahrukh khan's house....There we had the unimaginable luck of meeting a former loksabha candidate whobeleived that fornification was bad but self stimulation and satisfaction not...

He gave us a long speech on the effects of fornification and self stimulation and satisfaction onIndian economy and technological progress..It took us sometime to realize that this well dressed old gentleman was ..yes ..a liitle mad..He wouldnt leave us ....Bloody capitalist santhanu along with traitor Vijay left brandman geo and poor myself at the hands of Gaurav patil,RTD Cheif superintendend of Railways who according to himself could have become the Chairman had he fornificated......Finally we made that narrow escape promising him that we will take up and follow through his anti fornification /pro self stimulation and satisfaction campaign....


That was mannat...( was he making fun of us or was that some kind security system implemented by khan for keeping guys like us out..ahh?)we visited a few malls in the evening..casanova saheem had won a contest for typing in India's fastest SMS(Stupid Message from a Stupid)..and wasthere to redeem his prize from provouge ..Shakesphere Vinay was also there at his usual best..the same swagger..the same look..We spent the night on the terrace of the flat..sipping vodka and puffing cuban cigars....looking at lights of bambai and wondering whetherthe stars had really come down...

the next day saw the birth of a new capitalist...Santhanu..Santhanu Sasidharan....Santhanu Sasidharan nair....the one man who would have brought bombay had he had the money...though he had the mind..it seems that anything below RS 2000 is now unbuyable for the guy....Well the insight that he had on the trip was this...that money is not going to stay in has hands...My dream FD account turned into silly chitty company....buying everything and anything that came in his way..(I too contributed my part...on a smaller scale..)It was too tempting ....and we burned our pockets..


It was soon time to come back to our good old Pune with the lush green hills and plains,the cool climate and the calm breeze..We got a local bus to vashi and from there took a volvo to pune..And now back at office facing the monday morning blues..i feel it got over too fast....the trip for which we waited for the whole month got over so fast....

Bombay is highly industrialized and polluted,with people who have no time for anything..with busy trains and jammed roads,clogged drainsluxury cars ...with skyscrapers and slums...But the city does have an undeniable charm..which we can see in the smiles of all those who are there..in the chatter of taxiwallas and riksha drivers..in the slums and malls..there is that spirit...of commom love for their city...bambai....